![]() But for years I completely embodied my definition of 'loser'. Big house, nice car, fat bank account, nice stuff, etc. I have it all 'together' from the outside-in. I have an excellent career and make a good living. Do you do it while being a complete utter douchenugget, or do you do it in a manner that's meaningful and as admirable as possible? To me, if you think the former is okay, you're kind of a loser too. I think striving for financial success and maybe even infamy is a somewhat worthwhile thing, but defining its boundaries and at what cost it should be achieved is important. I'd call all of those traits that cause a massive loss of respect, which to me makes them huge losers. While these men were those things, this is easily overshadowed by their lack of empathy, lack of remorse, a disregard for people's safety, wellbeing, autonomy, their predatory and power-driven nature. You equate being a 'winner' with being financially successful, well-known, a 'big deal'. Your conceptualization of the word and approach to the entire thing is precisely antithetical to the general vibe in the thread. It causes way more problems than it solves. Worse, the more you wrap your head around this idea that someone, somewhere has judged you a loser will only internalize and demoralize you. I didn't loke how this person communicated to me, so I said as much, and it didn't really hit home that the way they were talking to me wasn't okay or, at least what I think, is the cordial way to talk to someone. By viewing people in those terms, you set yourself up for "conversations" and expectations like I literally just had in an anime subreddit. Try not to worry what people think of you, it's a "losing" "game". "normalcy", to worth, and that's just a logic leap.Īs for the rest, it's obvious how I feel about it. This is, as you point out, mostly a male-specific standard or worth or value.Īgain, people equate achievement, drive, stability, e.g. But societally we do shift a person's "value" to things like achievement, drive, even mental state, as being indicative of worth. But I fundamentally disagree with the idea of a "loser" beyond game and sport competitions. The entire idea of a "loser" has a lot of implications and variables. What do you think about the word "loser"? Places to talk about relationships and dating: Places to talk about emotional health issues: If that doesn't yield satisfactory results, then post.Ĭontact the mods only through the Message The Mods link Thread Filters: You do NOT need to ask a question to post a new thread on AskMenOver30ĭo a search of the sub before you ask your question. Women are completely welcome to fully participate. ![]() People under 30 are welcome if they are on board with keeping the discussion relevant to the over 30 crowd. Top level commenters must be flaired users. ISBN 1-93.The Rules Please Choose Flair About AskMenOver30ĪskMenOver30 is a place for supportive and friendly conversations among over 30 adults. Field Guide to Gestures: How to Identify and Interpret Virtually Every Gesture Known to Man.
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